Sanity soundbite

Every now and then, we fall back to discussing Julie's Gems - the acts, not the site. Usually, Julie will try to explain her way out of the situation. Unfortunately, the explanations tend hold about as much water as a colander. Made of rice paper.

Occasionally, Julie will examine herself, trying to work out what is going on in her head. As I have asserted on many occasions, my darling wife is not stupid nor in any way suffering from any mental disorder. She is highly intelligent, but just a little... erratic, shall we say. In fact, the only real difference between Julie and the rest of us is that the little filter between her personal world view and the real world is curiously absent. That, and the world's definition of 'normal' probably needs tweaking.

Actually, love, I would argue that you are a lot saner than many of the rest of us put together.

A generous, axe-wielding howler of a Gem

WOOHOO! We're back!
Many apologies for the absence, and I hope you haven't all drifted away through boredom. I promise you that we are now back on track and ready to post at our original rate of three times a week (Monday, Wednesday and Friday), with possible extra posts when we feel like it.

Since we last posted, Julie felt as though she needed to store up her reserves, which meant the Gem rate wasn't particularly high. However, that's not to say that my darling wife was entirely silent. In amongst everything else that had been happening in our chaotic couple of months away, we had a visit from Pierre, a good friend from Germany (something that confused Julie's already dubious geographical knowledge). It didn't help that she - for some reason - seemed to mentally default his name to Piers...

Anyhow, the day came, and we sat in the lounge, waiting for Pierre to arrive. Since we had never met in the flesh before, this was going to be an interesting meeting, and Julie was a tad nervous.

Now, was it nervousness that made Julie confuse psychopath, philanthropist and philatelist, or was she just getting back into Gemming with a fine old start? Whatever it was, welcome back, Julie!
As for Pierre, well, he proved to be a great guest, and it was fun to have him around for the weekend; pity it wasn't for longer... It also turned out that he had left his axe at home and has no interest in collecting stamps. However, he IS a rather generous person. While not precisely of philanthropic levels, we were stunned at the  basketful of goodies he brought us...

Booze, chocs, meats and - mmmm! - lots of pistachio nuts! As you can see, my friend is substantially taller than me (and rather cautious of camera flashes), but he was a gentle giant and it was a pleasure to have him as a houseguest.
Salud!

Of notebooks and hairy brains...

Sometimes, keeping up with Julie requires a very flexible brain and a supreme memory. Failing that, you could do what I do and carry a pen and a notepad around at all times - just in case, you know.
The thing is, it's not an ideal solution. For one thing, you'd be stuffed if you were outside in the rain. Windy weather is almost as bad, trying to keep things from flying away. Then too, you have the situation where you don't have anything to lean on and you're trying to rapidly jot down a long, rambling and above all convoluted Gem into a tiny notebook. Not only will you have trouble following what had been said, but you're almost certainly going to run into difficulties just reading your own scrawl...

Julie has her own objections to this arrangement. I completely sympathise with her too; I mean, it's got to be supremely off-putting when the least little thing you say may cause your nearest and dearest to stop suddenly and scribble every word down. Especially when we're about to play a game, too. Julie will settle down with a large glass of wine to hand. Me, I'll probably have a cuppa, but more importantly, out comes the notebook.
Naturally, Julie has plans to do away with the evidence - but in her own inimitable style...

It's probably also disheartening to discover that even your objections to an activity simply provokes that activity into... well, activity.
Heh. Gemming must be catching.

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Well, the next time you'll be reading a Gem will be Boxing Day. So, from both Julie and myself, to those who celebrate the day - Happy Christmas!

nb - On the off-chance you're around here on December 25th, we're hoping to have a little video put together for you. An alternative to the Queen's Speech, if you will.

Methadone in the madness

I have a nasty headache right now, so I'm going to keep this and the next post short - sorry about that; I may be able to expand on them tomorrow night.


Once again, Julie digs herself into a rapidly-deepening hole...

You know what? I think this is actually spot-on. Often, I'll wait for a few moments after Julie comes out with something, just in case there's some kind of explanation or rationalisation for what I've just heard.
This Gem doesn't need any. Job done.

Multiple personality disagreement alert.

Julie is fairly aware of what she does, but finds trouble in stopping herself from doing it. Her usual explanation is that her mouth goes faster than her brain and has to make stuff up while the next instructions come through. This is all well and good when she's with me or my family, but it does make her feel a little self-conscious when she goes off on one of her little mental trip-outs in public.

Or, as Julie herself put it....

Luckily though, Julie does enjoy the notoriety these Gems bring, so we're not going to be running short any time soon.

Have a great weekend!

Spike.

Talking your way into the asylum

A few people have wondered about how Julie has reacted to this baring of her delightfully silly soul. On the whole, it's not a problem, but when I give a laughing sigh and dip my hand into my pocket for my pen and pad, there's a distinct 'oh no' moment. Usually, all my wife says is, "Oh no, you don't want to write that down." Occasionally, though, she'll come up with another Gem, even as I'm trying to write down the previous one...

Honestly, sometimes it's all I can do to keep up with the woman...